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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27395845">Buzzed</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fictionalsideblog/pseuds/Fictionalsideblog'>Fictionalsideblog</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>InstaGoals [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Call Me By Your Name (2017) RPF, Call Me By Your Name - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Accidental Part Two, Bathroom Sex, Domestic Fluff, Head Shaving, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 20:27:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,535</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27395845</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fictionalsideblog/pseuds/Fictionalsideblog</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Timmy shaves his head with a little help, LIVE on the 'gram.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Timothée Chalamet/Armie Hammer</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>InstaGoals [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2001334</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>63</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Buzzed</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Accidental Part 2 to Finsta Fuck Up that literally no one asked for! Enjoy! Comment if you do :)</p><p>UNbeta'd because of course it is.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He paced the bathroom again, electric clippers in hand. </p><p> </p><p>He knew he had to do this, logically, they were going to do this for him the next day if he didn’t bite the bullet and do it himself.  He also recalled the anxiety his last enforced haircut brought to him, and frankly he didn’t want to go through <em> that </em>again. Especially considering this time they wanted him scalped, essentially. </p><p>No, this time he had to do it himself, and whatever freakout came after, at least he’d be in his own home for it.</p><p> </p><p>He sighed again and put them down, sitting in the seat by the mirror. </p><p> </p><p>“Still debating, huh?” His assistant, V’ spoke softly from the doorway, as she leaned in, with a smile, looking at him through the mirror. </p><p>“I know I need to it’s just what -”</p><p>“They told you - at least another year and that gives you plenty of time to grow it all back, remember.”</p><p>Yeah, he remembered, but cancelled, postponed and up in the air projects were all he’d been dealing with then, and the one he had been most looking forward to, the one he had put most effort into researching and concentrating on … well that just kept changing. </p><p> </p><p>He had already fucked himself by posting a lock of hair, cut, sitting on the bathroom sink. His Instagram was going nuts. So, really, he had to follow through whether he liked it or not.</p><p>Then he had yet another bright idea.</p><p>“Okay here’s what we’re gonna do -” he went over and grabbed her by the hand, taking her into the bathroom by the giant mirror, handing her the clippers. He then got his phone, and tilted it up, front camera on, facing out, against the shelf, testing to see if it got the right angle.</p><p>It did, perfectly. </p><p>He fixed his shorts higher on his hips, they kept slipping, and fidgeted with his oversized white t-shirt. It looked fine on him then, but with a buzz-cut? He shuddered at the thought of how many more ‘too skinny’ comments he would get in the press.</p><p>But, he soldiered on. What else was he going to do?</p><p>“But I’ve never shaved anyone’s head before!” she stated, clearly freaking out. </p><p>“It’ll be fine, just … you know, do it.” he shrugged. Her eyes went wider, her auburn bangs moving as her eyebrows raised. </p><p>“It’ll be <em>fine</em>,” he repeated laughing nervously, fidgeting with his phone until he figured out what he was doing. He had explained that he was going Live on Instagram, to hold himself accountable, and to hopefully make it fun. </p><p>She was not convinced. </p><p>As evident by the panicked attempt at shaving, letting out a scream and stepping back. Timmy screams too, the whole scene like something from a drunken comedy.</p><p>                        ****</p><p>“What the hell is all the screaming about in here,” came the deep voice from the doorway, both Tim and V’ laughing looked to see an amused Armie, leaning nonchalantly against the door frame, chewing the remains of whatever he was cooking in the kitchen, wearing only a pair of old sweatpants, it took all Timmy had in his giddy state not to laugh at what a walking thirst trap his man was.</p><p>“We’re Live on ig…” he warned, and Armie just grinned mid-chew. A warning, that was going to be ignored.</p><p>Armie glanced to the phone, waved moving in to inspect what V’ had started.</p><p>“Jesus… mutilation at dinner time?” And sure enough he ran his fingers up the buzzed line that V’ had managed before freaking out and stepping back. </p><p>He simply held up his hand to V’ who handed him the shaver. </p><p>“Hm… Are you sure about this? I mean you can’t ..<em> .get mad </em> if I do this.” Armie’s eyes were dancing with mischief, Timmy knew to expect something - especially now he knew they were literally broadcasting live.</p><p>“I won’t get mad - “</p><p>“Because we all know how attached you are to -” he smirked.</p><p>“I won’t get mad.” Timmy reiterated, almost pouting.</p><p>“Hm. Hold on.” And with that he disappeared from the bathroom - Timmy looked to his phone and shrugged - he didn’t dare look at the numbers yet.  A few seconds later, Armie reappeared, with scissors. He moved to where Timmy sat, and looked down at him, forcing him to look all the way up at him. He wanted to glance at his phone to see what this looked like. He knew, what in his head, it looked like at least and he gulped.</p><p>Armie smiled. Cocky.</p><p>Not good for Timmy. </p><p>They had kept mostly to themselves ever since their initial ‘Coming Out’ on the gram, as it were, and for the most part people let them be. But every now and then they’d be spotted or there would be news and the media frenzy began again. He can only imagine what this was going to do. </p><p>And he was right to be a bit worried about how smug Armie looked - he took the handle of the scissors in his mouth before leaning down and spreading Timmy’s knees.</p><p>Timmy heard V’ smirk behind him but she was out of his - and his phone’s eye-line now, now it was just him and Armie.</p><p>Him with spread knees, and Armie sinking to his.</p><p>Timmy widened his eyes in warning, what the fuck was he -</p><p>“Tilt up.” He asked Tim, moving his head straight for him by his chin. </p><p>“<em> Hm </em>,” he stated again before gracefully getting up to his full height again. He was clearly playing with Timmy now, and he shouldn’t have expected anything less.</p><p>He reached for a section of hair, gripped tight and tilted Timmy’s head back, Timmy’s mouth opening on instinct because that fucker knew, he <em> knew </em>that he likes that - he…</p><p>It took all of Timmy’s strength to remember he couldn’t over react - not live on the fucking internet. But he also knew they would be getting calls about this.</p><p><em> This isn’t acceptable Timothee - </em>he can hear ringing in his ears, sounding like his manager.</p><p>Foreplay on the gram isn’t their norm… at least not so overtly.</p><p>But just like that, he started chopping into his hair, piece by piece fell around them, and soon the bathroom floor was covered in hair, and Timmy already felt bald. </p><p>He glanced in the mirror and burst out laughing. Armie and V’ too. </p><p>“Oh my GOD, hurry up and fix it!”</p><p>They all were laughing again by this point, his anxiety was through the roof but nothing like last time. Here he still had control and he trusted Armie completely.</p><p>“What you don’t wanna rock this for - “</p><p>“<em>Armieee</em>!” </p><p>“Okay, okay, hold on.”  His cocky smile softened then as he meticulously took a different setting on the clippers, and went all in, and too- soon for Tim’s liking, he stood back, lips still in his concentrated pout, to admire his handy work.</p><p>“There… all done. You wanna look?”</p><p>He was scared, but his phone was still running, so he did. And yeah okay he did a really great job. He was evenly shaven, his head felt like a fuzzy teddy beard he’d had as a child. His ears felt cold already. But he smiled, into the camera, into the mirror, and caught the look in Armie’s eye as he watched him watch him, through both.</p><p>Oh.</p><p>
  <em> He liked it. </em>
</p><p>Thank God, he thought, but, also, he didn’t expect <em> that </em>look right off the bat.</p><p>He threw a peace sign up at the phone and hit off on Live, making sure he was fully offline, his paranoid brain even made him turn off the wi-fi, just in case. As V’ looked to them both, still looking at each other through the mirror.</p><p>“I’ve got some emails to catch up on down stairs… with my headphones in... for a while I’ll… yeah.” she added, awkwardly aware of the air in the room now, both men merely smiled as she made her exit. Armie, wasting no time at all in closing the bathroom door behind her, and locking it.</p><p>A thrill ran down Timmy’ spine at the sound, and it wasn’t just a chill because he was <em> basically </em>bald now.</p><p>No, it was that look that he now knew so well, of the approaching six foot five man crowding him against the bathroom vanity. </p><p>“I didn’t think you’d like me - it that much…” he exhaled quietly as he was pushed gently against the cold marble.</p><p>Tim couldn’t handle looking him in the eyes anymore, it was too intense, so he looked down a little and focused in on the other man’s neck, he loved his neck, his bobbing Adam’s Apple, the tan that  faded slightly throughout his torso then, covered in soft dark blond hair some bleached lighter with the sun, the tan marks fading more as his eyes got to the waistband of his sweatpants. The dichotomy of textures from his facial scruff, to this, always fascinated Timmy who loved to touch.</p><p>“I can’t believe you just walked in here looking like sin … the internet is probably -”</p><p>“You think I give a fuck about -”</p><p>“Yes, I think you do.” he defiantly made eye contact then, just as Armie pushed, grinding against him. The moan that escaped wasn’t going to deter his thoughts though. “I think you give a lot of fucks about all that, you like to <em> pretend </em>that you don’t - “</p><p>“It’s bull -”</p><p>He felt like they had this conversation every time something happened online. And maybe they did. It never changed the result though. Timmy was always right. And Armie knew that too.</p><p>“It might be, but that doesn’t mean you can’t care. I know you’ve been … restless with us and the public and I know that you relished in this little show tonight, more than even I thought you might.”</p><p>He grinned then, looking at Timmy’s mouth, raising a hand, dipping his fingers around Timmy’s lips.</p><p>“Is that so -”</p><p>Timmy just cut that thought short with a swift cupping of Armie’s already hard dick through his sweatpants.</p><p>“Yes, it’s so.”</p><p>Armie hissed, before attaching his lips to Timmy neck aggressively kissing and swiping his two day scuff on his skin, deliberately making it hurt <em> good </em>, before pulling back; his other hand now back in Tim’s hair - or lack thereof. The fascinated look in Armie’s ice blue eyes, shining in the reflection of the vanity mirror bulbs. </p><p>“You’re beautiful.” </p><p>“Don’t change the subject.”</p><p>“I’m not. You’re beautiful and maybe I hate the socials because everyone else gets a piece of you there too … they get their little entitled asses all in a bunch any time you move - they <em> stan </em>- they love - they tried to hurt -”</p><p>“That was one time -” </p><p>“One time too many … how dare anyone touch a hair on your head.”</p><p>Ah, there it was. Timmy couldn’t help but huff out a laugh of his own.</p><p>“Except you, right? </p><p>Armie trailed his fingers over Tim’s buzzed head and down his to his cheek where he held him there before leaning in for another kiss, and pulling back again, leaving goose bumps in his wake.</p><p>He shrugged. Adorably so. </p><p>“This was a power play ... but not for ME…”</p><p>Hips pressed up against his in a slow, delicious grind, and he groaned, then pressed back.</p><p>“No, it most definitely was for you.”</p><p>“<em> And </em> them.”</p><p>He merely shrugged again. “If they learn their place ...well... that’s just a happy accident.”</p><p>It made him emotional how much Armie loved him, and not in the big, grand gesture type ways only but the little, sometimes passive aggressive ways they both showed they cared when they needed to. Timmy leaned in and kissed him again, wanting to mark an accidental romantic moment in his brain. Of course the romantic aspect of it lasted all of five seconds before the horny aspect of it just took over the show.  Armie bit his lower lip until it almost hurt, before smiling and flipping him over so he was leaning against the cold marble of the vanity, something about this all felt frantic, even though realistically they were in their home, they had all the time in the world. But still, the feeling of underlying panic engulfed him, hastening when Armie yanked his sweats and underwear down in one swoop, pooling them at his ankles before kissing the back of his neck, now bare, sliding his stupidly large, warm hands up under his t-shirt… before sliding back to his knees again, and tilting Timmy again, this time, further over the sink.</p><p>“FUCK!”</p><p>He felt the breath of a laugh before Armie did <em> that </em>again. Licking and circling and running his fingernails up and down his legs - all of it so much sensation at once, all Timmy could do was grip onto the faucet, for dear life it seemed. </p><p>“Jeee ...sus… God -” he moaned as he turned the faucet on, the sound of the running water the only thing drowning both their moans out, as Armie went deeper, pushing him further against the marble, before Tim felt his hand on his dick, palming him before blindly starting to jerk him simultaneously. </p><p>“Fucking <em> fucking </em>fuck -” he moaned into the crook of his arm now, as he laid himself out freely hopeless of gaining even a smidge of control, not that he really wanted it at the moment though.</p><p>The sensual rhythm that was only theirs was one they fell into so easily, Timmy just as easily falling into the lull of pleasure from his partner, the drifting, floaty feeling of close orgasm building slowly then rapidly as Armie switched up the pace, and just as it felt too-too much, Armie did what he usually did - surprised him, by turning him around, taking his length in his mouth and sucked and licked until Tim came with a shudder, surprisingly silent, in and around his lovers mouth.</p><p>Refusing the give in to the buckle of his knees, he watched Armie gracefully rise once again to his full height, standing over him, a mess - a happy, smiley mess.  He pecked Timmy one the cheek before leaning over, rinsing out his mouth, splashing water on his face, and patting himself  dry, and cleaning them both up with the small towel hung up next to them.</p><p>Grinning down at him, smug. </p><p>“Dinner’s almost ready, I’ve made your favourite with the steaks.”</p><p>That meant at <em> least </em>two different types of potatoes. </p><p>Timmy smiled, running his hand through his hair instinctively, still finding it odd to feel nothing there. Armie leaned in again and kissed his forehead.</p><p>“Beautiful.” </p><p>Armie got to the door and added a quiet, “Don’t take too long getting used to it, okay?” before pulling his own phone out of his pocket.</p><p>Which means I know you don’t believe it yet but I do. </p><p>“Oh look, we’re in trouble, <em> again </em>.” he winked with a smile before disappearing out the door. </p><p>Timmy looked in the mirror again, still very <em> not </em>used to his new look yet, but it was enough to know his guy loved him every which way, even if he also loved getting them into the best kind of trouble.</p><p>He hoped that never stopped.</p><p>Even if he wished the chastising phone calls <em>would</em>.</p><p> </p>
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